To: Cust.Services@cupid.gods Subject: Complaint

Customer Services
Cupid Life Partners UK Ltd
Cloud 9
Up There Somewhere

10 December 2009

Dear Sirs

My purchase of Wife, Model "Sharon"

Many years ago I purchased from you an early model Girlfriend. Unfortunately the available model was not suitable for my needs at that time and was returned to you for modification. In early 2000 I took delivery of the improved version.

I was extremely happy with the "new and improved" Sharon and quickly took advantage of the opportunity to upgrade her to the "Fiancée" specification.

Again, I was very pleased with my purchase and, despite the significant expense involved, upgraded to the "Wife" specification just over 9 years ago and signed the "Lifetime Exclusivity Deal" available. In the main I have been very happy with the performance of the goods supplied.

It has recently come to my attention, however, that there were significant failings in the manufacture of the basic hardware onto which the Girlfriend, Fiancée and Wife upgrades were installed.

To by blunt, my Sharon is falling apart.

Minor hardware failures have necessitated no fewer than 12 visits to the factory repair shop, including 2 invasive repair procedures. Your technical team are currently investigating technical problems with the processing unit that lead to severe problems with data entry and processing. We are still uncertain as to whether these require physical repair to the circuitry or simply adjustments to the BIOS

I have grown quite attached to my Sharon model Wife, although I am aware that her hardware is "old technology", and have no desire to exchange her for a new model. However, given that these appear to be inherent design or manufacturing problems, I would appreciate some contribution from your firm to the ongoing costs of repair and maintenance. I would also help greatly if you could have a word with your maintenance team and speed up the resolution of our current difficulties.

I look forward to your response.

Yours faithfully,

Paul Taylor
Owner, Wife model Sharon

p.s. You couldn't throw in a free boob renovation and upgrade whilst you're at it could you?

(Copied and updated from my 2004 blog entry)